My Muse

My Muse sits forlorn
She wishes she had not been born
She sits in the cold
No word she says is ever told.

Why does my Muse only speak when she is unhappy?
She does not, I only listen when I am unhappy
When I am happy I live and despise writing
For my Muse this cannot but be dispiriting.

- stevie smith

[they once were wise men...]

I have seen the wanderers on their wanderings
entranced by the sun but blind to the light.
Convinced the journey is redemption, they admire their worn sandals
and will not stop for water. Neither jeweled oasis nor humble cottage
will do, for they wear weariness as a virtue and
thirst as a badge of wisdom. They have no goal,
no aim, for (they say) it is arrogant to think there is Rest anywhere.
They grow belligerent when they see women by the Well,
laughing and draining Water from a simple cup. They scoff,
nursing their parched tongues and encouraging each other
not to break down and drink. "For," they say, "how do we
know if that is really water for drinking...or if it's even water at all?"
Their greatest fear is being satisfied, for Thirst is their god,
and they worship by wandering in the desert...  

__________________________________________________________________

“But as for you who forsake the LORD

   and forget my holy mountain, who spread a table for Fortune & fill bowls of mixed wine for Destiny, I will destine you for the sword, & all of you will fall in the slaughter; for I called but you did not answer, I spoke but you did not listen. You did evil in my sight & chose what displeases me.”  

Therefore this is what the Sovereign LORD says:
   “My servants will eat, but you will go hungry; my servants will drink, but you will go thirsty; my servants will rejoice, but you will be put to shame. My servants will sing out of the joy of their hearts, but you will cry out  from anguish of heart & wail in brokenness of spirit. - Isaiah 65:11-14

(photo by me: Florida Keys)  

[all you need is]

[painting]

i picked up the brush
                           dipped
                                 it                    lifted it,
                         into the water,                     and watched
                                                                     
a drop                                                                       
s
p
l
a
s
h

the paper bloomed.
I love the color red.
             
                                                                             

william's wife

He fell in love with a dark-eyed girl as she walked in the garden after noon (oh how the time as flown!)

photo by me: Anne Hathaway's House, Staunton, VA

little loves, little joys

look for the little joys.
they are everywhere:
honeycomb bliss of a morning waffle
                  small purple blossoms on a tree
your mother's voice, concerned and loving
                    an errant wave that soaks your knee

beware the little loves.
they lurk everywhere:
shallow throb of a passing stranger
              cinema romance fills the night
your birthright spent on peacock trifles
               gossip-cocktails, clothes too tight

For joy is a gift from our good Creator,
scattered below for us to find
while love is another thing altogether...
careful, friend, how you use God's heart.


                 
                                       

Prayer (as I labor to pray for those observing Ramadan)

Lord, I am sick of hollow holiness.
False prayers.
Calloused heart.

Lord, i am unclean.
Purify me.
Make me like you, that I may be in your presence. That I may fellowship with your Spirit and your Son. That I may know your mind and better worship You.

For you are great, and you are good.
In You there is no darkness, only joy and unending Light.
You are the supply and increase,
the source and center,
the pith and meaning of all that is true, worthy, eternal, and excellent.

I want to know you, through your Son Jesus Christ, and that is my all-consuming reason for holiness. Show me how to follow you. Teach me how to please you. Bend my heart away from folly, and fix it on your Name, your perfect heart. Incline my ears to only hear your voice, that they will be deaf to temptation, deaf to despair, and deaf to vanity.

Lord, I confess that many times a day, I seek to appear your disciple only because I crave the adoration of mere men. Yet that sort of service to You is not what you want, and as I know you better, it is not what I want either. Please tear off the mask of reverence that entombs me, and mold my living soul into a mirror that reflects your face, so I will have no use for masks, no fear of man, and no unrest in my inmost being.

I have tried to heal myself, but there is no human remedy for this spiritual disease of sin and pride – no matter what I do, I cannot rid myself of its influence. I look to you, I cry out to you.

Heal me, O Healer, and I shall praise you!!! Deliver me from the grip of death, and I will shout your name among the living; I will glorify you, my Redeemer, with all that I am!

[triumph or disaster]

wild-animal morning
desires rushing in, demanding my
consent. O Lord, my Christ &
Messiah, Emmanuel - my hope
& risen LORD -
       help!
Surely I will be torn to pieces:
selfish ambition
              envy
                     lust
         anger, malice
               divisions
               disorders
           covetousness -
i tremble.

O, Son of Man, tempted even as I!
tested yet unbroken;
pure
& faultless

completely filled with
                              RIGHTEOUSNESS
& right desires -
         lead me!

Your Father is my Father.
Lead me into His presence.
I am in your care.

o heart, rejoice!

"See, the nails have penetrated through, and from both hands and feet gushes forth the blood of the Holy One.

O these nails have rent the rock of salvation for us, that is may pour forth the water of life; have reft the heavenly bush of balm that it may send forth its perfume.

Yes, they have pierced the hand-writing that was against us, and have nailed it to the tree; and by wounding the Just One, have penetrated through the head of the old serpent.

O let no one be deceived with respect to Him who was thus nailed to the cross! Those pierced hands bless more powerfully than while they moved freely and unfettered. They are the hands of a wonderful Architect who is building the frame of an eternal Church-yea, they are the hands of a Hero, which take from the strong man all his spoil. And believe me, there is no help or salvation save in these hands; and these bleeding feet tread more powerfully than when no fetters restrained their steps. Nothing springs or blooms in the world, except beneath the prints of these feet...

Thank God! in that scene of suffering the Sun of Grace rises over a sinful world, and the Lion of Judah ascends into the region of the spirits that have the power of the air in order, in a mysterious conflict, eternally to disarm them on our behalf."

-"The Suffering Savior," by F.W. Krummacher (gracias to Phil Greendyk for drawing my attention to Krummacher)

a-r-t-i-c-u-l-a-t-e

Simply said, I am insufficient.
Clearly stated, I am doomed to fail.
Only destiny, destruction, only option is despair.

All true, proved in me, & in the lives of all men
save one:
One perfect man,
Jesus Christ.

His power overpowers my inadequacies.
His death destroys my failure.
His life alters my destiny.
His love conquers my despair.
Simply stated, He is my Savior.
Clearly said, He is my LORD.

Most of the Time

Most of the time the thief keeps what he has stolen;
most of the time the robber gets away.

Most of the time the widow's heart is broken;
most of the time the orphan has to pay.

Most of the time the king collects the harvest,
most of the time the worker is his slave.

Most of the time the truth is covered over; 

most of the time deception wins the day. 

Most of the time the sun sets after it rises; 

most of the time heroes are just men.

Most of the time...

But there will come a day
when the sky is ripped apart with light -
thieves will freeze in their tracks
kings will cower on their thrones
liars will choke where they stand.
They will see the one called Faithful and True,
they will come face to face with the Heir of All Things.

He, the First and Last, will judge them,
and the widows, watching, will dance.
And the fatherless, the voiceless, will sing.
And the slaves will leap, and the whole earth will cry out with joy!

For everything will be set right!
Everything stolen - restored.
Everything crushed - restored.
Everything extorted - repaid.
Everything trampled and battered and broken,
everything mocked and twisted and torn -
Redeemed.
Answered.
Everything.

Most of the time, I forget to remember that there is one hero who is no mere man....