PARODY TIME!

The Orange

By Wendy Cope (probably written AFTER she graduated from college)


At lunchtime I bought a huge orange
The size of it made us all laugh.
I peeled it and shared it with Robert and Dave—
They got quarters and I had a half.


And that orange it made me so happy,
As ordinary things often do
Just lately. The shopping. A walk in the park
This is peace and contentment. It’s new.


The rest of the day was quite easy.
I did all my jobs on my list
And enjoyed them and had some time over.
I love you. I’m glad I exist.

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END OF TERM

by Cate Pilgrim (definitely written before she graduated from college)

On Wednesday I had a huge test,
the length of it made us all cry.
I fought hard but lost to Jacob and Dan-
they got A's so now I want to die.

And that test, it made me real grumpy,
as schoolwork things always can
so quickly. The cramming. A talk with a prof
This rage and disgust - not a fan.

The rest of my week was quite awful.
I missed two dumb exams on my list
and failed some 'cuz of questions leftover.
I hate life. I've never been kissed.